Random Dude quits job to "bangalore" himself

In the latest and most heart-rending episode of the rising unemployment saga, a man who wished to be referred to only as Random Dude, has quit his lucrative and high-paying job after he "overheard two fellow employees talk about random dudes being bangalore-d". When pressed further on the issue, Dude tied his lips up with string, and when we looked at him incredulously, he wrote with pink chalk on a nearby black stone - " I am tightlipped!". (At this point we had to impose a restraining order on 20 people to prevent them from beating themselves to death with the same black stone.) Our in-house economist, Dr. Swa. Ha had this to say about the issue: "Give and take... that's the soundest economic policy." Random Dude flies out to Bangalore, India tomorrow evening to apply for employment at whatever company will get the contract from his former employers. The local president of Internationally Diversified Individuals Overreacting Tragically (IDIOTs) has planned a send-off party for Random Dude. They will give him a black-market copy of Fyodor Dostoevsky's The Idiot which is Holy Writ for the self-help group. "I woke up on a plane one day to find this in my lap" was the explanation for the gift.